Hey there, first-year university students!
If you're feeling the weight of stress, overwhelmed, or maybe you're battling with anxiety disorder, you're not alone. It's a common theme and something I dealt with throughout my university experience, juggling assignments, social life, and the newfound independence that comes with university life are all exciting, but with that, there came pressure, isolation and overwhelm.
Let me take you on a journey through my personal experience managing my university stress and how this experience shaped a simple tool that helps other students tackle the same feelings a decade later.
The Start of My University Journey
Before commencing my university studies, I had encountered instances of anxiety. While my OCD had been a part of my life since childhood, anxiety attacks and general anxious feelings were not significantly impacting my daily routine during this period.
I recall receiving the schedule for freshers week and marking all the social events and parties I planned to attend (none of which materialized).
I cannot pinpoint exactly what caused me to retreat from the freshers' week experience, even within the initial days, as I believe it was not a singular reason. The entire process felt rushed, regardless of my level of preparedness. Suddenly finding myself alone in a new environment, expected to effortlessly forge lifelong friendships, was daunting. The situation was further exacerbated by a mix-up in my class timetable, leading me to attend the wrong classes for the first two weeks—not an ideal start socially or academically. By the time I rectified the schedule, it seemed like everyone had already formed close bonds.
When one envisions a university, large lecture halls filled with students may come to mind, which in itself can be intimidating. However, in my case, it felt even more challenging. I was part of a very small class that resembled a school setting. With around 30 peers in my year split into two groups, there was limited room for building new friendships. Cliques formed swiftly, and unfortunately, I found myself on the outside.
The beginning of my university journey did not align with my expectations, and these shattered hopes, I believe, set me on a path that ultimately resulted in an anxiety-laden experience over the following three years.
I want to emphasize that not everyone had a similar experience. I strive to be candid about my mental health challenges to assist others in preparing and to prevent them from feeling isolated, rather than discouraging them from what could be an immensely rewarding experience for many.
My Journey with Journalling
I was hesitant to resort to medication for my anxiety, as I was already struggling to define my identity. I feared that taking medication might deepen my sense of disconnection and leave me questioning whether my true self was being overshadowed by the effects of the medication. Therefore, I felt compelled to explore all other options available to me.
My initial attempt at coping was through journaling, which I embraced diligently and persistently. Despite my initial challenges with reading and writing, I committed to writing daily to cultivate this habit, driven by a strong desire for personal growth.
As I gradually accustomed myself to the practice of journaling, I gained confidence in expressing my thoughts and feelings, especially those that were difficult to articulate or comprehend. Through this process, I found solace in documenting my fears, triumphs, and uncertainties, which helped me unravel the complexities of my emotions.
By identifying and examining my anxiety triggers through journaling, I engaged in a therapeutic process that provided me with clarity and insight into the root causes of my distress. It was this profound experience that inspired me to create something beneficial for mental well-being – a journal.
Unleashing the Power of Reflection
Utilizing a journal had a profound impact on me, particularly in terms of enabling self-reflection. Despite my innate curiosity, the intensity of my anxiety during my university years hindered my ability to engage in meaningful introspection. Instead of delving into the reasons behind my emotions, I often resorted to merely attempting to calm myself down or, even better, falling asleep. While asleep, I felt a sense of relief from the grip of my own mind.
Journaling itself served as a form of therapy. As I poured my thoughts onto the pages, clarity began to emerge. The journal acted as an impartial sounding board, absorbing my words without judgment. Revisiting my entries allowed me to monitor my progress, identify behavioural patterns, and develop strategies to manage my anxiety. It was akin to having a personal mentor guiding me along the way.
Through this process, I discovered that my mind was highly analytical. To overcome my struggles, I needed to understand the root cause of my "unwell" state. I realized that my anxiety stemmed from somewhere, and merely masking the symptoms was not a sustainable solution. I embarked on a journey to unravel the triggers of my anxiety, working backwards to address them. In essence, it became a mental project for me, offering both distraction and a sense of achievement.
This methodical approach eventually evolved into the structure of the Discovery Journal, devoid of emotional bias.
Breaking Free from Anxiety's Grip
It took me years to successfully conquer my anxiety disorder, and I am very proud of this achievement. Although I wish I had started the journey sooner, I must remember that it was a decade ago, and the mental health resources available now were not as easily accessible or acknowledged back then.
I haven't forgotten my anxiety, it's something that lives with me to this day but I control it, I know what it is when it comes along and I understand how it got there. Just this understanding allows me to not fear it in the same way I did. It makes it manageable for me.
And when I think back on university it makes me sad, I feel like I missed out on something so monumental in my life but without that experience, I wouldn't be where I am now so...silver linings maybe?
Discovering Discovery Journal
The Discovery Journal was developed based on the coping techniques I learned during my university years and subsequent recovery from anxiety.
I aimed to help many students avoid the trial-and-error process I went through in finding an effective recovery management system.
This journal has become a symbol of empowerment, reminding me of the progress I had made on my mental health journey.
Final Thoughts
Remember, it's okay not to be okay, but it's crucial to take proactive steps towards your well-being during all this change. You deserve to thrive in university and beyond and have an experience worth writing home about.
Stay strong, stay resilient, and remember, you're never alone on this path to managing your university stress.
Keep journaling, keep growing!
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